Saturday, August 17, 2013

Becoming 20

             I turned 20 today. My teenage years have officially come to an end! And weirdly enough, I don't miss it and I'm quite accepting of this change. Maybe because the change isn't so prominent, like I'm still using the same toothbrush as I did when I was 19 for goodness sake =P. I remember last year when I turned 19; I had so many regrets, unfulfilled wishes and desires which left me with the worst feeling in the world, and I could only pacify myself with the sole accomplishment of placing on the CAPE Merit List. As a result of that, I made a promise to myself to change this and accomplish everything I wanted to do throughout my teenage years in this last final year of teen-ess. I even made a list! By the way, lists are very efficient... so I'm definitely a list maker now lol. I'm very proud to say that I kept this promise to myself. With a year off I had enough time to be able to accomplish many things since turning 19 last year. I worked hard to accomplish the things on my teenage list, that it almost makes sense to turn 20 now; so that I can start a new chapter of my life and make a new list.
                 In my last year of teen-ess, I managed to:-
-Get my drivers license.... but still not allowed to drive =|
-Learn to drive both right hand and left hand cars....... and still not allowed to drive!
-Somewhat dye my hair a crayz colour... but I learned that dying your hair isn't everything it's cut out to was pink for a while but black is more professional.
- Finally clean/pimp my room.... so that I could actually walk on the other side of the room lol.
-Write SAT's and 2 SAT subjects..... I wonder why I didn't do this after writing CXC :S
-Write BMAT.... never had I felt so stupid but I did manage to score really high in the essay! But then again I don't know anyone who hasn't :/
-Write CXC Physics and get a distinction.... I'm so proud of this because in September my mother tried to put me in lessons and everyone refused me. I remember talking to this one lessons teacher in particular and when I said that the only topic in Physics that I know is graphs, he told me that it is impossible for me to learn the entire form 4 and 5 syllabus in 4 months. Well with the help of my friends and a brave lessons teacher that we only came to know in the middle of December, I was able learn everything in one month =D Take that mean teacher man! hmph.
-Attain two scholarships.... open government schol and an admissions schol from UoT, lolz even though the University of Toronto one isn't so big, it makes me feel better about myself =P lol lol.
-Get into medical school... =D Med school is very hard to get into btw!!! sigh*
-Get my hair cut properly..... and re-grow it lol.
-Start learning classical Indian dance......... key word is learning lol.
-Umm.. Read 7 books so far this year..... lolz that's a lot, I usually read like 3 books a year =| 
-Umm...Try sushi... and love it.
-Actually play Holi... on public grounds with strangers..... way too much freaks for my liking lol.
-Raise a baby parrot... :D she's too adorable... well at least I believe it's a she....

             Well obviously I didn't too many 'cool' things this year, but at least I got some stuff done and I have no regrets...which is a most awesome feeling. However there are things I haven't managed to do like write a book, which is something I always wanted to do before turning 20.... It was hard not accomplishing it at first but even though my teen-ess is over and I won't be noted as an amazing teen writer... life goes on still, and I could still be the next Rowling perhaps?

"Time flies. It's up to you to be the navigator." Robert Orben

            Within a year I was able to learn so much and I had time to think and look at life from my perspective not society's perspective. When I was 18, falling in love and doing crazy teenager things seemed to be the things that made you a normal eighteener. But now I know that there's more to life than falling in love and having a great love story. Eventually I realised that it wasn't about silly stories that I couldn't tell and more about stories that I would want to tell... stories that if the world knew I could hold my head up with pride. And that became more important than having many little stories that I could never tell anyone. Over this time, I learnt that setting goals for yourself is most important, or else you would have spent the time wandering aimlessly. I've learnt that any relationship involving people should be discussed between them to prevent misconceptions of where the relationship stands. I've learnt that no matter how badly you try to prevent it, things will always change, including yourself, so be gracious and accepting about it. I've learnt that the only people you can truly count on is yourself and God. I've learnt that the key to making delicious, melt in your gulab jamoon is using less flour ( yea I'm somewhat of an expert now lol). I've learnt that guys don't care about your face, for them it's all about the body. I've learnt that the phrase 'the truth will set you free' is most accurate, no matter how biblical it sounds. I've learnt that not everyone that you're fond of will have your best interest at heart, so learn how to identify those people so you can keep a safe distance. I've learnt that confidence is really what makes and breaks a person and as cheesy as it may be; your inner thoughts really are reflected outwards. I've learnt that the proper way to wash your hair is to actually massage your scalp, not scrub. For the longest time I wanted to be 'popular'... oh dear God I feel like this should be an embarrassing moments post but anyway, might as well continue. For the longest time I wanted to be 'popular' for the same reason everyone wants to be popular and well I guess from the start of time I was never popular people material so my dream of popularity was never attained. It's only now I realise that I shouldn't have wasted my time trying to be popular but rather have realised my nerdiness earlier and work towards being more successful and skilled to have an impressive resume. So the summary of this lesson is to be yourself and don't pretend to be something you're not, especially if it's counter productive. I've learnt that being independent is very important for survival but breaking away and leaving your parents is as difficult as self dependency itself. So to decrease the difficulty of moving away from your parents, slowly learn to do things for yourself over time, this is great advice for those of you planning to study away from home. For introvert people like myself, I've learnt to not be afraid of stepping out of my comfort zone as there's so much out there, you just need to be brave. And lastly, many people learn from their mistakes, however I try to limit my embarrassing moments  these days and I find it wiser to learn from the mistakes of others. Obviously this last lesson requires judgement as you can't watch your friend marry their first love and have their marriage end in a divorce and tell yourself that you won't marry your first love as the same may happen to you. However you can see that their spouse was an adulterer and know not to marry that person as it would be lead to the same outcome........ unless they were cheating on your friend with you because what you both had was real unlike their marriage to your friend. In a case like that you are a horrible friend, and well in the end if they could cheat on your friend they could cheat on you... which brings us back to my lesson of learning from the mistakes of others which is what this post is somewhat about, all of you learning from me =). 
          I hope that these lessons would have somehow helped you and made an impact on you as it did on me. I started this post on my birthday and I'm finally posting it now, some weeks after so please forgive that. Another goal of mine that I didn't get to complete before turning 20 is completing 100 blog posts... but it is now my goal to complete that before heading off to university, so stay tuned =). For those of you turning 20, Happy Birthday and may the start of this new decade move you closer towards the person you want to be and bring you your heart's desires =)

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