Sunday, March 27, 2011

Sighs

              Ok well I came across this stuff when I was really bored, and I was thinking that they really do apply to life.... like some of them apply to people, and the rest to CAPE!! lolz Well have as much fun as I did =).


For all my attention whores =)



So very, very true =(








You could say that again =S







My secret desire =D



To all the players out there who treat girls like Pokemon, catching them all won't make you the very best =)



Teehee =D



Ahah I love this!


      

El Espanol de Google

      Ok, soo I'm taking a break from the dumb things guys do this weekend, n well I'm bringing you something a little different. Sometime during this week I recovered my long lost ability to speak Spanish- which is now nothing but a mere shadow of what it used to be. And I also discovered the amazing Google Translate- which I believe can be very inaccurate when it comes to translations. So today you get to see them both at work!! =D YAY!! 
      So a few lines from different songs have been chosen for me to translate into Spanish. Please note that I only learnt the very basics of Spanish in school and for the last two years I haven't done a word of Spanish because I was studying French. So after I translate that, we'll see what Google Translate said about what I said. Now let's see my brilliance at work! =P


1.Original line: Every night in my dreams, I see you, I feel you.
My Spanish: Todas las noches en mi dreamos , yo vu tu, yo tucho tu.
Google Translate: Every night in my dreamos, I vu you, me, your cartridge.

2.Original line: I can be your hero baby, I can take away the pain.
My Spanish: Yo ser te hero babe, yo quiero hace el duele muerte.
Google Translate: I be your hero babe, I want to make the painful death.


3.Original line: I wake up in the morning feeling like P. Diddy.
My Spanish: Me levante en la manana como P. Diddy.
Google Translate: I woke up in the morning as P. Diddy. <---- Most Accurate One lolz


4.Original line: You change your mind, like a girls changes clothes.
My Spanish: Tu change te cabeza, como las muchachas change las ropas.
Google Translate: Your head will change as the girls change clothes.


5.Original line: Black dress, with the tights underneath- she's got the breath of the last cigarette on her teeth.
My Spanish: Ropa negra, y les pantalones subo- ella tienes la boca de finito cigar pon ella dientes.
Google Translate: Black clothes and pants they go up, she got the mouth of finite cigar put her teeth.


6.Original line: So you dare tell me who to be, who died and made you king of anything?
My Spanish: Epa, tu dice a me que a ser, que muerte y hacer tu le rein de todos les tings.
Google Translate: Hey, you tell me who to be, that your death and make you queen of all them tings.


Saturday, March 19, 2011

Things Guys Do [2].

     Well guess what everybody?!?!!? It's that special time of the week when you all get to read how annoying guys can be =). So last week, we had a couple of pointers and well nobody disagreed.... so we'll just go with the hunch that I'm right. And well this week I doubt that I'll be wrong =P So let's continue this random list of things guys do.
Things Guys do:-
5. Guys have really weird hairstyles. 
Ok so I kno us girls have sum really weird do's and we can be really extreme with our hair but it's just because we have soo much and we like to experiment. But OMG! You guys have really limited hair and yet the things you all do with it! I had no idea a guy could style his hair in soo many ways..... back in my day guys, I don't even think guys used to comb their hair =S lolz, and it was only when I was like 8 or 9, guys started spiking up their hair- I remember my cousin used to finish a  bottle of gel in a week. Don't get me wrong, it's gud that you guys take interest in how you look.... but usually when one grooms themselves, it's supposed to be for the better! Guys, you have some flat out RIDICULOUS hairstyles!!!! So the main point you all should know is that girls like a guy with nice hair- that's probs why ppl like Bieber [it's the only reason I cud think of =S]. And since a lot of you guys don't have a good face or body to work wit, MAKE GOOD USE OF YOUR HAIR. So with those words in mind  like to point out the following;
I believe the faux hawk came out in Trinidad like 2 years ago or sumthing? Anyways it's still in style... well I hope so becuz nearly every guy in Trini has one, and you all THINK you look soo hottt! But truth in the matter is you all don't, some of you could pass but whoaaa the rest... YOU RENDER ME SPEECHLESS  AND THROW ME INTO A LAUGHING COMA!!!  
Like what is this -------------------------->
I'll tell you what that is! It's a MESS! Don't leave your house with your head looking like that plz.


So as if that wasn't bad enough, fellas like to go all out and add COLOR! And as if allyuh Indians weren't coolie enough, you just had to add RED AND BLONDE!! And you walk like you're so fly, but rly... u all jsut look like BIRDS!!!


THIS IS CALLED THE ROOSTER!! cock-a-doodle doo! =P Sry I couldn't find any pics of the Cockatoo to show you all =(.
I believe this is how a faux hawk should look:

Another infamous hairstyle is to attain the 'emo' look. So for some reason they have real depressed Trinis out there, and I don't mean to point it out but I will - most of them are Indians and well I'm wondering if they're not getting enough roti in their diet =S.Lolz well I guess they're scene emo, not cut urself emo [ even thought sum of them claim that they cut themselves]. So yea you all ever take a walk in Trincity Mall on a Saturday?? Well if you haven't, just go one day and take in the crowd, you'll swear something is wrong with today's youth. Anyways, enuff of my thoughts, the real deal here, is ur 'emo' hair! This my friends is what emo hairstyles should look like:
Note how well flat ironed their bangs are, look how healthy their hair looks. Note the lack of grease as well.
Now this is what you all look like:
Note how burnt his hair looks =S Note how ridiculous he looks after having seen the previous photo lolz. Wellz I'm sry folks but I have seen the 'real emo ppl' =P lolz.  I've seen the guys who spend more time straightening their hair than I do, I've seen them with their extensions and cool hair colors- in comparison my friends.... you all look  BLOODY RIDICULOUS. And for those of you ehem, 'emos' out there, plz don't color your hair so that it looks like this, plz I beg, PLZ DON'T DO THIS:- it's not as cool as it seems.

 I know Trinidad have real bad humidity and ting and that could tend to make ur hair frizz and what not, the solution is, DON'T DO IT! But I know allyuh can't resist, so I advise that you use product like, 'Advance Techniques; Frizz Control Lotus Shield' and not  products which make ur hair too greasy[ you would be able to know these products after having used them, not everything works for every body]. Plz avoid using gel, or for the most  TOO MUCH GEL, or else you would just look like this:
Note how his hair starts to clump together! YUCKY =S lolz, yes this does not come off as appealing, avoid using a lot of gel in ur hair at all times. When you apply a lot of gel, we can notice becuz the light reflects off ur head. It looks as if u rubbed two saheenas on your head =(  Look at the following picture, see how bad the guy on the right looks- thats how you look when u have too much gel in ur hair.
On the note of using gel, guys tend to slick their hair down in what we call the 'church boy'. Like yea.... who does the church boy these days??? Like it's cute on little boys, but seriously..... ur 19/20- TRY AND FIND SOMETHING THAT WORKS FOR YOU.
If you do the church boy, don't slick it down!!!! You can still manage to rock a side part with ungreasy hair which just gives a healthy shine.

And guys with longish hair, idk what to say about allyuh. some of allyuh is a mess, some of allyuh have better hair than me. But if you want to have long hair and not too sure what's a good look, consider this;


6. Guys use girls.
 So guys use girls and well that's not nice. When a guy uses a girl, there's usually another girl involved- it's either to make a girl jealous, such as a previous girlfriend or it could be to get to know another girl better, this girl is usually best friends with the girl they're using. Or maybe it could be becuz the girl has cool stuff, idk like maybe a cool car or sumthing like that, which guys like. Mainly guys use girls to give themselves ranks! And so  I humbly ask all you guys out there to stop using girls, plz. It's hurtful, very hurtful. Don't go around dating girls just so that ur friends will think ur cool- date sumbody that u actually like and intend for ur relationship to last more than 6 weeks.I know that it's easier to talk to an ugly girl than it is to talk to a pretty girl- but that doesn't mean that you should befriend someone to get to their friend. Now befriending ppl isn't wrong, but it is wrong when you befriend a girl who you would normally be caught dead talking to ,just to get to know her friend. Honestly, just grow a pair and go talk to the girl herself, DON'T USE HER FRIEND AS  A PAWN. Don't use a girl to get ur ex jealous becuz to make a girl think that you like her is just really cruel, if you are going to use her - honestly just tell her. Befriend her and let her know that you still have feelings for ur ex and that u wud like to know if she wud help u get her back. Honestly I think any girl would be willing to help you if they understand ur situation, so make them understand.  Making her fall in 'love' wit u, just to break her heart a few days later is uncool.Don't use girls for their possessions or else they will DROP KICK YOU. So basically if u have girls as ur friends, it's ok they'll help you and what not; but don't go around  talking to girls conveniently, preying on their feelings because you will regret it in due time.

7. Guys only talk to 'pretty' girls.
Guys have a tendency to only talk to you, when you're pretty. So let's say that a girl goes to extra classes, we shall call her Radica [lolz] and she dresses bummy- meaning that she's wearing slack jeans/ loose t-shirt/ messy hair/ no make up. It is pretty much safe to say that guys there WON'T RUSH to talk to her, becuz even though Radica looks like 'crap' =P, there will always be a girl there who takes the time to comb her hair and what not to look bess, so let's call her Pussungi [ lolz x2]. And from keen observations I can tell you that guys will flock around Pussungi and not even notice that Radica is there, the most she'll probably get is a 'Hi'. But later that day, Radica and Pussungi end up at a social gathering and Squeaks  from extra classes is there. Well as you probably figured- Squeaks ignored Radica all day today, but that evening after talking to Pussungi, he walks Radica's way for a lil one on one convo!! Why?? Well one could only assume it's because Radica is now looking BESS. Yes, guys you are soooo guilty of this! Guys make it their business to talk to a girl when she's looking hott and they want everybody to see them talking to  this HOTT girl and this therefore carries us back to #6- Guys use girls. Listen fellas, I'm sure you know girls like Radica and well the whole Cinderella story[ prince noticing her for the 1st time @ the ball scene] not gonna work for u becuz I'm very sure u have this girl on facebook and I'm sure u have looked through her pics already. Here's what, I know you guys are really shallow, so after having looked through her pics you should know by now if she looks good wen she dresses up or if they have no hope fuh she at all [ everybody has different tastes]. So she look rel nice in that pic @ she tanty wedding, niceee. Now all you have to do is talk to her all the time whether she's dressed up or not if u still want to have a chance with her. I always say: IF YOU DON'T LIKE ME AT MY WORST THEN YOU DON'T DESERVE ME AT MY BEST. I think it's true. If a guy thinks I'm disgusting when I look like crap, den he doesn't deserve to be in my presence when I look my best. So guys appreciate girls at all times and if her looks are that important to you then I don't think you're ready to be in a relationship or even be out here looking for one, becuz what's on the inside matters most - just keep window shopping mutely ... wat else could I say??

8. Guys are players.
Guys are players, and the line ' Don't hate the player, hate the game' is completely out of bounds when making excuses for your behavior. It's not a game, if girls wanted to play a friggin' game they'd be watching GSN!!!  IT'S CALLED A RELATIONSHIP NOT A GAME! Girls mature faster and tend to want a steady relationship, it doesn't have to be really serious- she just wants to know that at the end of the day, she's the only girl you rly like and to hear you say how lucky you are to have her =) Guys on the other hand tend to chase more than 1 girl at any one time. Why??? Guys answer me this- Why be a player??? Ok so you're sweet talking every girls you see... why? Do you think that if you have 5 girls, there's a greater possibility of one of those 5 liking you whereas wit 1 girl, the possibility is slimmer?? Well wrong! So out of those five girls, the one who actually likes you will be the one who's looking at you all the time cuz blah blah blah she thinks ur cute and can't keep her eyes off you- Do you think dat with her secretly stealing glances at you that she won't see you talking to 4 other girls?? She most likely will and then she'll think that you like dem and not her- CHANCES RUINED. Do you think its makes you a  BAD BOY?? No, it makes you a BOTTOM!!  Is it that you have no respect for women?? It must be that, becuz seriously, having 5 relationships simultaneously? You know that only 1 could last forever, so why break 5 hearts? Do you want to be lonely forever? Don't believe in love?HAVE YOU EVER HEARD OF MONOGAMY ?? If your reasons are to deal with the last 3 points, plz go to church/temple/mosque from now on- You need God =S. Anyways nobody wants a player, it's either ur in or ur out- you can't stand in the bloody door way. But most of you guys aren't players in the sense that u have 5 girls, it's more in the sense that u are chasing 5 girls at the same time. Darlings, if you put all that energy you spend chasing 5 girls into chasing 1 girl, you might actually have a girlfriend. So please re-assess ur life, and get ur act together.

     Wow ok, so this is really long!! =S =O I tried to cover all the ridiculous hairstyles, but I don't think I did becuz u guys have soo many!! =S. Well that's it for this week's list of annoying/confusing/ gay things that guys do =). So yes, girls if you know guys who do these things, feel free to tell them about this post [ subtly post it on their wall with a 'YOU HAVE TO READ THIS' =P lolz]  and guys plz take note, I'm only trying to help =) lolz. Go try n fix ur hair now.





Sunday, March 13, 2011

Things Guys Do [1].

       Ok so guys say that girls are really complicated and they don't understand them at all...and I agree! But I mean who are they to trash girls when they are just the same! Like, there are things guys do that girls just don't get, there are things that they do that make no sense at all and there are things that they do that are just plain out GAY! So girls obviously put their owning meanings to things cuz nobody judges better and assumes better than girls. So idk, if there are any guys reading this maybe they can correct me if I'm wrong [ I'm rarely wrong btw =P].
So there are a couple of things guys do, and well it's hard to classify it into categories, so let's begin this list of things guys do in a complete random order  =)
Things Guys do :-
1. Guys tell you that they work out.
In a totally random way, guys find sum way to mention that they work out, it doesn't even make sense!  Idk why at the end of a convo they have to be like, ' Ok bye I'm gonna work out' or at the beginning, ' Wow, I just finished working out' or sum where during the convo they like to randomly interject, 'Wow I don't wanna go to the gym' or, 'I'm soo tired from gym'. Oh and what about the ultimate best..... Posting it as ur facebook status!!!!! Classic! So why do guys do this?? Idk! I would assume it's because they are trying to impress u. Sry, but unless we ask, it doesn't rly impress the ladies, if u want us to know that u work out-  we should see sum real evidence of that, and not be totally shocked that u actually work out wen I see it as ur status pon d book =(


2. Guys wait for you to talk to them first.
Ok, idk y, but guys wait for girls to talk to them first! A guy would watch you for more than 5 mins, u know for sure that he's interested in you.... yet he refuses to talk to you. Padna that is ur loss! So yea, idk if guys play hard to get or what, or maybe they wanna feel special that a girl came up to them today.. idk. Guys, you should know that for the past centuries,  men courted women, you should know that playing hard to get is a woman's job, you should know that the act of u trying to impress the girl through romantic gestures[ not by telling her that u work out] is what gives way to real relationships, not the petty crap that most people fool themselves with. And personally, even if I like you I would wait for you to talk to me .... I don't go man hunting. So guys if you like a girl, go talk to her! I mean you don't have to tell her u like her rite away, but simple convo is just fine. And wen I say talk I don't mean facebook chat, msn or texting, talk to her and tell her you like her over the phone or in person. And if you are gonna wait for the girl to tell you that she likes you or for her to talk to you first..... yuh go stay rite there!


3. Guys don't know how to start a convo.
Yes I know I told you all to make the first move in # 2, that's why I'll teach you how to...lolz. Ok so wen you want to talk to a girl.... don't lie! If you see her reading a book, don't approach her saying, 'Wow that book was rly gud, u'll enjoy,' if u never read the book. If you read the book... good move! The convo can then be about books which is a good start... but if u didn't then u dead hoss!!!!! They will eventually find out u lied and then they will avoid talking to you,... unless before she gives you a death stare you tell her that ur joking. Also, don't act like u are the hottest thing known to man, but still maintain a sense of confidence - it can have that whole bad boy appeal, but remember don't be over confident cuz den we'll just wanna kick you where the sun don't shine. DO NOT POKE! Don't poke the girl , just don't poke her!!!!! Virtual poking maybe acceptable on fb and its probs becuz nobody rly checks their pokes but don't do it in person unless you're rly rly jaw dropping hott ok. Yea, so basically try to create a comfortable atmosphere where they won't mind talking to you, avoid freaking them out or allowing them to think ur a freak by doing weird things..... like poking them. Maybe you could try a more subtle approach like, 'Hey, you do the hw?', a lil awkwardness could be cute.. but only if it makes them laugh. That's all I could rly say.. it's more a practical experience sry. =/


4. Guys talk to girls about their friend/s.
So for some reason, guys find it necessary that during their convo with you to somehow ask you about ur fren . So for example, Squeaks will be talking to you gud gud, 'Wat u doin?', 'How was ur day?' and then all of a sudden, Squeaks just ups and says, ' So umm ur friend, Pushmatie doh like meh?', 'Tell she I was only joking nah', 'Pushmatie like meh?'. Guys what's that about?? Are u trying to make it clear that u are not interested in us? Are u trying to make us jealous? Do you really like Pushmatie? Are you trying to find out information on Pushmatie? Plz tell me cuz I don't know!! So here it is, if u are trying to make it clear that u are uninterested in us... then just don't talk to us, sooner or later we'll get the hint. If you trying to make us jealous den sry, becuz as girls, if our frens like a guy, we learn to accept it....... so we'll familiarize ourselves wit the fact that u don't like us and that u like Pushmatie and well... basically u just ruined ur chances. Also if you are trying to make it seem that ur attention is else where.. it's not flattering to us----> CHANCES RUINED. If it is that u rly do like Pushmatie... den why the hell u telling us???? Go and talk to Pushmatie! Don't be talking to US, telling US how u like HER!!! That's just ridiculous, so we go and tell our frens about it, i.e including Pushmatie and we laugh at u!!!!! And well if u trying to play a lil Sherlock Holmes... I sry eh, But I doh BUSS FILES. Even though girls like to gossip, we don't buss we fren's  files.... if you wanna find out sumthing about her, go and ask her plz. Allyuh real ridiculous eh! =P

           So yes that's it for now, four things that guys do that we don't get and they should stop..... In due time, I will continue this list and teach you guys how to be real men. So that one day u'll sweep the girl of ur dreams off her feet and live happily ever after... becuz alyuh too damn chupid to figure it out by alyuhself!  I rel sry for the harshness, but guys these days, most of allyuh rel gay n sad and that makes me sad =(...... but don't wry I will help you to not be gay and sad, just follow the advice =)

Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Topless Pics

NB: the important points of this article will be in caps and I am not randomly shouting at you =P

       So it appears that the world is on facebook - the fastest growing social network! Now reasoning only stands that if the world is seeing you... then you MUST LOOK GOOD! That's why you choose your best pic as ur profile picture and for those ppl who dont put pictures of themselves and instead they put cartoons n pics of celebrities....... why do u do that? Is it becuz u don't want creepy ppl to stalk you???? Well newsflash, without a pic of urself everybody else thinks YOU ARE A CREEPY STALKER PERSON. So to assume the role of a normal person, please put a decent pic of yourself, now see the keyword is 'DECENT'. Please note that I did not say hott or sexy or other words like that becuz facebook is not a playboy magazine and the world does not need to see u in ur booty shorts on ur bed as a first impression. And if ur like me, you may not be the best looking person out but certain angles can actually make u better looking - trust me =P. Yea so even if it's rare that u have a gud pic den leave dat gud pic as ur pro pic, so long as u look decent. Having difficulties understanding this??? Take a look at this vid =D <3<3 <3

           Now the title of this post is called 'Topless pics'and well as we discussed before... girls can't have topless pics as their pro pics because, for better choice of words - it's INDECENT. But for some reason it is rather the norm for guys to be shirtless hence society would have it that it's ok for guys to be shirtless in their pro pics. But like always, I have my own opinions; now yes it's unfair that guys can be shirtless and girls can't but thats not a justifiable reason cause I'm sure a lot of creeps out there would like to see girls topless =S.  So just cause ur a guy doesn't mean u cud go putting up shirtless pics of urself as u please, there are a few ground rules to follow and in choosing a pic if ur discretion is poor - ignore it.

Here are the RULES guys:-
 1. DO NOT  put a shirtless pro pic of urself if u are SKINNY n for some strange reason u think u have a hott body, cause honey u don't. Just cause ur skinny doesn't mean u have abs, darling dats ur ribs we're seeing and trust me, cuz I say this wit all honesty, nobody and I mean NOBODY WANTS TO SEE UR CHICKEN CHEST!
2. DO NOT put a shirtless pro pic of urself if u are FAT. Oh my! like Oh my the horrors =S - What are u people thinking?!?!?! I kno fat ppl have esteem problems becuz I am fat but, like honestly how did u think that could possibly be attractive?? I have no further comments for this except a word of advice - GO remove that pic NOW!! I don't care if u have to put up a pic of Spongebob! Just go remove it now, thank u. Now sum of u guys mite be 'big boned'[ lolz so my fren describes it] and well it may make u look fat even if u aren't- and honey u are still burning my retinas, go change ur pro pic now plz. And for those guys who are going to the gym all the time n think that they should put up pics of their gradual monthly process with the burning of the fat, the toning of the muscles, darling, sugar, honey plz wait till u reach the sculpting of the muscles.
3. If you are fat, skinny or ripped- plz wax! If u think u are a male model n wish to put up these distasteful pro pics- come on at least be professional about ur imaginary never to happen career =P
4. You may feel free to put up shirtless pics of urself if u closely, n i mean very closely resemble Jake. lolz 


            Now having a gud body doesn't mean that u can go taking shirtless pics of urself whenever and wherever u like, it just means that half the world population won't be paying psychiatric bills. Yes, u have a 6 pack n u want to get all the girls, but in all seriousness male vanity pics are a major deal breaker - unless however u look like Jake n we find u too cute to be disgusted or disturbed by ur bold self interest. But if u are at an event and IT JUST SO HAPPENS THAT U ARE SHIRTLESS,  eg. The beach, and there are cameras around feel free to pose for a few pics cuz it's acceptable in my eyes. And that goes for girls too, if u are at the beach n u have a rly gud SLIM figure and even if u are rly skinny it is ok to take pics of urself in a bikini. My full figured girls, go ahead as long as u feel comfortable in a bikini, u can wear one but if u are going to put one as ur pro pic, please use ur discretion and choose one where u look rly bess or else u will give ppl sumthing to talk about. BIKINI = BEACH/ POOL--> Girls, despite looking like a supermodel in ur bikini, it does not mean that u can pose randomly in ur house wit ur bikini on and take vanity pics in ur bathroom- it can somewhat make u come off as an ATTENTION WHORE. Wen u wear a bikini and there is no water around u- it's not cool. So there u have it my views so far on facebook pro pics, you may now feel free to go and change urs now lolz.